The Sex Thread (may be NSFW in places)

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Re: The Sex Thread (may be NSFW in places)

Post by Charn on Wed 01 Feb 2012, 7:21 am

ChumbaWumba wrote:I was absolutely manhandled by this girl on Saturday at a club and she kept on telling me how if she didn't have a boyfriend she would've screwed me there and then or something. Kinda got a bit excessive but thought nothing more of it.

She walked into my seminar today. Turns out she chose one of my modules as a free elective and it just so happened we were in the same class that day. INSANE LEVELS OF AWKWARD.

If she didn't have a boyfriend hahahahaha. Why are you using the word 'manhandled'? It just sounds like you were being beaten up by some girl all night...
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Re: The Sex Thread (may be NSFW in places)

Post by ChumbaWumba on Wed 01 Feb 2012, 7:50 am

Charn wrote:If she didn't have a boyfriend hahahahaha. Why are you using the word 'manhandled'? It just sounds like you were being beaten up by some girl all night...

She was rather rough, the boyfriend think just freaked me out but I was so drunk I couldn't comprehend the entire situation! (-_-'). She was like 'yeah i'm with my boyfriend and but he's somewhere in the club. I've only been with him a month and I love him but you make me [insert obvious word here]'. All of this whilst she had me up against a wall, I felt like such a bitch HA.
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Re: The Sex Thread (may be NSFW in places)

Post by Charn on Wed 01 Feb 2012, 7:59 am

ChumbaWumba wrote:
Charn wrote:If she didn't have a boyfriend hahahahaha. Why are you using the word 'manhandled'? It just sounds like you were being beaten up by some girl all night...

She was rather rough, the boyfriend think just freaked me out but I was so drunk I couldn't comprehend the entire situation! (-_-'). She was like 'yeah i'm with my boyfriend and but he's somewhere in the club. I've only been with him a month and I love him but you make me [insert obvious word here]'. All of this whilst she had me up against a wall, I felt like such a bitch HA.

HAHAHA, that sounds like something out of the Inbetweeners! Her poor boyfriend!
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Re: The Sex Thread (may be NSFW in places)

Post by ChumbaWumba on Wed 01 Feb 2012, 8:00 am

To top it all off my head has been killing me all day after I ran into a lamppost last night. Not only was my seminar really awkward but it was really painful too.

MY LIFE IS AN ACTUAL JOKE
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Re: The Sex Thread (may be NSFW in places)

Post by Charn on Wed 01 Feb 2012, 8:04 am

Yeah, but it's so funny you have to laugh at yourself!
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Re: The Sex Thread (may be NSFW in places)

Post by Jaaakkkeee on Wed 01 Feb 2012, 11:51 pm

I got rode last night. Was awesome. I love it when the girl pushes you off her and jumps on top and takes you to town.

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Re: The Sex Thread (may be NSFW in places)

Post by kappa99 on Thu 02 Feb 2012, 5:57 am

A forumer on here was shagging his GF on my couch last Saturday night, and 2 of my mates camehome from a cluband walked in on them.

What did they do? Sit down, talk to them and ased kif te girl had came yet, hi 5's the forumer, took some pics and started asking if it had gone soft or it was till inside, hen left the room.

Im not naming th forumer,, butsom people know hahahha.

Also weirdest places to have sex - against a concrete block that was part ofa mobile phone mast in some woods, Bondi beach (whil my roomies were within sight/hearing distance but didnt notice) the back of a student union, my car, and school toilets (altough that wa sjust a blowie)
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Re: The Sex Thread (may be NSFW in places)

Post by Malky on Thu 02 Feb 2012, 10:46 am

Shagger yas! Also I've heard his bird is a moaner from some sound sources.
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Re: The Sex Thread (may be NSFW in places)

Post by eilidhbrian on Thu 02 Feb 2012, 8:37 pm

I heard about this too, Tom texted me immediately. You can't tell him anything.
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Re: The Sex Thread (may be NSFW in places)

Post by orwellaintdead on Sun 12 Feb 2012, 8:26 am

Flatmate just told me he has never performed cunnilingus on a girl. He is nearly 19 and has slept with 5 girls, and been in a 2 year relationship. I think that is mental.
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Re: The Sex Thread (may be NSFW in places)

Post by Sophiee on Mon 13 Feb 2012, 1:37 am

kappa99 wrote:A forumer on here was shagging his GF on my couch last Saturday night, and 2 of my mates camehome from a cluband walked in on them.

What did they do? Sit down, talk to them and ased kif te girl had came yet, hi 5's the forumer, took some pics and started asking if it had gone soft or it was till inside, hen left the room.

Im not naming th forumer,, butsom people know hahahha.

Also weirdest places to have sex - against a concrete block that was part ofa mobile phone mast in some woods, Bondi beach (whil my roomies were within sight/hearing distance but didnt notice) the back of a student union, my car, and school toilets (altough that wa sjust a blowie)
Hahahah, who was it?! Name names!
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Re: The Sex Thread (may be NSFW in places)

Post by Malky on Tue 14 Feb 2012, 11:01 pm

Can't be named for legal reasons. Also to save his shame.
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Re: The Sex Thread (may be NSFW in places)

Post by Malky on Wed 15 Feb 2012, 12:56 am

THERE'S YOUR DINNER BEEATCH.


Last edited by Malky on Wed 15 Feb 2012, 12:59 am; edited 1 time in total
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Re: The Sex Thread (may be NSFW in places)

Post by orwellaintdead on Wed 15 Feb 2012, 12:58 am

One of the funniest things I have ever seen.
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Re: The Sex Thread (may be NSFW in places)

Post by Malky on Wed 15 Feb 2012, 1:00 am

Love they're listening to Pink.
YA DIRTY MIDDEN YE

Also that's got a 77% "yes" vote on there. The fuck, man.
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Re: The Sex Thread (may be NSFW in places)

Post by Dodson on Wed 15 Feb 2012, 9:26 pm

I remember when that was on here ages ago haha
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Re: The Sex Thread (may be NSFW in places)

Post by Malky on Thu 16 Feb 2012, 2:04 am

Preston two years ago. Jed remembers.
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Re: The Sex Thread (may be NSFW in places)

Post by Jaaakkkeee on Thu 16 Feb 2012, 2:47 am

It was on efukt for ages. "rough sex fail".

Scream

Scream


AAAAAGGGGHHHHHHHHH.

I ripped the audio, still wanting to splice it in to a song in a band some day.

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Re: The Sex Thread (may be NSFW in places)

Post by Skully on Thu 16 Feb 2012, 11:03 pm

Ya dirty midden.... Scream.. (breakdown) WOB WOB WOB WOB WOb Suck my cock WOB WOB WOB WOB
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Re: The Sex Thread (may be NSFW in places)

Post by Jaaakkkeee on Thu 16 Feb 2012, 11:45 pm

Exactly. either that or just spliced in to a track with my band.

riffriffriffriffriffriff YA DIRTY MIDDEN. HERE'S YER DINNER ON A PLATE riff riff riff riff riff.

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Re: The Sex Thread (may be NSFW in places)

Post by Jed on Mon 27 Feb 2012, 11:39 am

Malky wrote:Preston two years ago. Jed remembers.

I remember me and you telling Rou to eat his fuckin' dinner while he was eating his chips, don't think we put him off though. Was fucking lolz man.
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Re: The Sex Thread (may be NSFW in places)

Post by ChumbaWumba on Wed 14 Mar 2012, 6:59 am

For anyone that didn't know it's 'Steak and Blowjob day' tomorrow apparently.
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Re: The Sex Thread (may be NSFW in places)

Post by kappa99 on Wed 14 Mar 2012, 4:30 pm

30 seconds in,I wont ruin what happens but there's a mystery guest who makes this video fucking HILAIOUS. Gotta love efukts humourporn.

http://www.efukt.com/20962_OOPS!_I_Accidentally_Sodomized_You!.html
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Re: The Sex Thread (may be NSFW in places)

Post by Charn on Thu 15 Mar 2012, 2:03 am

ChumbaWumba wrote:For anyone that didn't know it's 'Steak and Blowjob day' tomorrow apparently.

For the lucky people it is. -_-
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Re: The Sex Thread (may be NSFW in places)

Post by kappa99 on Thu 15 Mar 2012, 3:43 am

Charn wrote:
ChumbaWumba wrote:For anyone that didn't know it's 'Steak and Blowjob day' tomorrow apparently.

For the lucky people it is. -_-

Connor not into sucking your dick?
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Re: The Sex Thread (may be NSFW in places)

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